“Season’s Greetings once again, fellow dinosaur lovers! This year, we are adding an extra dose of culture to our holiday review by paying homage to The Nutcracker. I, your humble Dr. Bella Bricking, am playing the titular character while my delightful companion Beth Buildit plays the Sugar Plum Fairy.”
“This is the worst thing you’ve done to me yet, Doc! What did I do to deserve this?!”
“Now, now, the show must go on, Beth. Besides, this is a momentous occasion. We are reviewing something completely new: a specimen of Aquilops! Aquilops was a small basal ceratopsian that resided in North America during the Early Cretaceous period, approximately 109 to 104 million years ago. It has recently shot to fame due to its appearance in Jurassic World: Rebirth. The set we will be reviewing here is 76970 Baby Dinosaurs Dolores: Aquilops, consisting of 339 pieces.”
“Alright, guess it’s time for our usual workout then, Doc. Can we at least ditch these accessories? I hate candy canes.”
“Oh, very well, Beth, if it will stem your gratuitous churlishness.”
“Ouch. Shutting up now, Doc.”
“Here is the completed Dolores. She measures 20.5 cm long from the tip of her beak to the end of her tail and has a maximum height of 13 cm. She is coloured dark red, light brown, beige, and tan with black, dark grey, and light grey parts at her joints and a few bits of pale yellow here and there. Her eyes are yellow and black, her mouth is red, and her claws are black.”
“Awww. She’s so cute, Doc! Look at those big eyes and those cool rounded claws! Plus she’s pretty fun to play with. She’s got a hinged lower jaw, universal joints at her neck and ankles, ball-jointed shoulders and wrists, hinged elbows, ratcheting hips, and a swinging tail. Only her elbows aren’t strong enough to support her weight on all fours, so make sure you’ve got her legs angled right.”
“She is indeed an adorable animal, Beth. And while she is clearly intended to be an exaggerated depiction of Aquilops, she does feature the distinctive forward-facing bump on her rostral. I would also be remiss if I did not point out that her hands and feet only have three digits, not the four and five digit configuration that is typical of ceratopsians.”
“And speaking of hands, Dolores also comes with a little flowering shrub for her to munch on. You can even attach the flowers and leaves to the studs on her hands. Again, super cute!”
“I take it then you are pleased with this set, Beth?”
“Yeah, Dolores is a pretty cool and easy build, Doc, and she’s loads of fun to play with. Hard to imagine anyone not liking her!”
“Jolly good! And now, my dear Beth, it is time once again for us to bid our fellow dinosaur lovers a fond farewell, the happiest of holidays, and all the best for next year.”
“Keep on standing strong there, folks. Speak up for what you believe in, keep your loved ones close, and take care of yourselves. Oh yeah, and don’t ever stop fighting fascism!”
“Bravo to that, Beth! Bravo indeed!”
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